• Uphill Battles

    by  • January 4, 2011 • norcal scene, race coverage, womyn on weels • 2 Comments

    still_tastes_good.jpgStraight off the line ~ thanks to any and all heading back to this website after the long hiatus from posts populating.    Due to some gentle nudging by a co-conspirator and the (more predictable) new energy a turn of the racing calendar generates, there just might be some regularity to the irrationality spun on the site … again.

    There are a few items on the docket for this particular post, and I’m pretty sure each will get sassed out in full, but in case the caffeine runs dry or my fingers fade like this morning’s interval legs, here’s the outlined achievables:

    1. NOT all posts on this website are authored by me, Hernando the ridiculous.  In fact, there are a good dozen miscreants who have access to publish on this site, but rarely do because they are lazy bitches.  However, I will highlight a couple of the regular contributors and let you know how (nay, force you) to discriminate between the authors and lay blame accordingly.
    2. NorCal Team CORRECTIONS and additions ~ yes, I’ve been messaged a good number of corrections from the recent posts gauntleted down by a fellow NorcalCyclingnews author.
    3. San Bruno Hill Climb … the first race of 2011 ~ a recap, a blow-by-blow, an acknowledgment that it’s a retarded way to start a year.
    4. Rand Miller is a pussy.


    OK ~ on with the show!

    – – – – –

    This website needs a paternity test!

    There are three individuals who do most of the posting on this website:

    • gist_of_website.jpgHERNANDO
      … myself, michael hernandez, prince of poser-town, usa.
      … a south bay hooligan who likes to start shit, but writes anonymously ~ who’s name seems eerily close to Bed Turns.
    • Hernandito
      … the funniest of the three chamoigos, but the one who doesn’t post on this site anymore because his own personal blog has become the NorCal hotbed of cylco-scientific shit-talking.

    There are others who contribute to this site … from likes of the original imaginer and uber-admin, Sabine Dukes, to the femme-fatal and Rouse powerhouse Elis Bradshaw.  But, for the most part (and currently), the majority of posts you see on this site will either by by HELLYER or HERNANDO.  I know, easily confused … so, below is an example of how to figure out who’s doing what muckracking.



    This website needs factchecking like FoxNews!

    After the recent posts about the 2011 NorCal team rosters by the aforementioned NorcalCyclingnews contributor Hellyer (cough, cough … did i mention Bed Turns … cough, cough), there were a number of teams who sent me corrections and additions to the listings thrown down by my colleague.  The below spasms of accuracy act as our way of getting things fair and balanced.
    {thanks for the messages, and keep the info coming plz}

    TIBCO II … women ready to rock

    tibco_design.jpgJill Eyres was cool enough to send word about the local contingent of category 2/3 riders that will make up the TIBCO II squad this year.  2011 is the second year for the local development team, and while they will continue to focus on road events for this year, they have also added talent and the energy to expand into racing the velodrome.  Which is rad.

    There looks to be a TIBCO II addition to the Team TIBCO webpage in the works for 2011, so stay tuned for that.  The new roster for the team is: Emily Weinert, Danielle Haulman, Ann Kodani, Bobbi Jo Price, Shari Countryman, Alissa Maglaty, Christine Harris, Kerry Stivaletti, and Leah Toeniskoetter.

    This squad is filled with very cool, awfully fun women and I’m really looking forward to watching them add their good vibe to the NorCal scene this year.
    – – –

    PRIMAL Wear/MapMyRide … 2 locals kicking ass

    primallogo.pngEmily Kachorek and Liza Rachetto have joined this new professional squad on the US women’s circuit.   Kachorek was a collegiate cycling phenom a few years back and has returned to racing in the last couple years with a rabid ferocity.  Teaming up with the experienced international racer Rachetto, these two riders will infuse an aggressive, attacking racing style into an already powerful squad of Primal screamers.

    Look for these women to steal a few NRC podiums away from the bigger outfits this year as they have a couple of very solid sprinters and a saavy tactician, or two.  Also, be sure to check out Rachetto and Kirsten Armstrong’s women’s racing clinics for 2011.  There will be a couple in the Bay Area, but check out the first one in Palm Desert come mid-February.
    – – –

    Team Affinity … really Team Sycomp

    Laurie Furman was good enough to give the scoop on the Team Sycomp squad.  Sycomp is a partner of IBM and the racing team name of the club, Team Affinity.  I know, another tech company advertising through women’s cycling.   But if we think about it ~ the tech industry is still way-too male dominated a field … and there just might be something to software gleeps being interested in finding out more about a company represented by superfit, hell-bent sprinter women in spandex.   Not a bad use of a few marketing dollars.


    And while Bed Turns may feel this women’s team is going to be a powerful masters squad, Laurie corrects us in that they’ve got some wickedly talented younger riders to watch, as well.   Kimmy Ladd was the winner of the NCNCA Category 3 Best All-Around Rider series for 2010 and has quite a few years left before she’ll be eligible for the geezer categories.  And we can add to that youthful stream a spritely Karena Shannon – a top 5 in the BAR standings, as well as Joanna Betchel – a 26 year-old who rocked the Bs in cross this season by winning the Bay Area Super Prestige Series.

    These young guns will be backed by older, experienced teammates which will result in some winning combinations.
    – – –

    Wells Fargo vs Fremont Bank

    bankers_hours.jpgJim Williams let us know that although the new Fremont Bank squad did grow out of the Wells Fargo Racing Team … the two teams will both be racing in 2011 and the only rivalry between them will be to see which bank has the faster teller lines.

    Wells Fargo will be fielding a sizable squad of riders and it will be interesting to see if their masters riders will continue to score big points in the men’s and women’s series standings.
    – – –

    Mike’s Bikes … get ready to party, boyz!

    l_mikesbikes.jpgBen Stern kicked out some details on the newest NorCal squad to start scrapping around town.  Mike’s Bikes is one of, if not the most successful bike store companies ever to slap inner tubes on a peg-board.

    They’ve entered into the NorCal p1/2 racing scene with a plan to grow the squad in the future.  The focus of the team will be very localized with accessibility through shop rides and local crits as central to the team’s efforts.

    As Stern puts it, the team will focus on expanding Mike’s Bikes reputation as a high-end provider of road riding gear.  They have 9 bay area stores, “now carrying Wilier, Zipp, and Reynolds products in addition to top end machines from Cannondale and Specialized. The team is outfitted with Cannondale Super Six high mod 2, with SRAM Red groups and Specialized accessories.”

    The 2011 Mike’s Bikes roster:

    Tyler Dibble (from the Yahoo! Cycling Team)
    Shawn Rosenthal (former national U23 TT champ, now coach)
    Rainier Schaefer (fixie superstar who made a big splash at Hellyer and the road in 2010)
    Steve O’Mara (echelon Z team climber)
    Henry Scholz (21-year old cyclocross stud, and budding roadie)
    and the Hellyer Velodrome vandals,
    Ben Stern
    Matt Talbott
    Nole Studley
    Maurice Monge

    – – –

    San Bruno Hill Climb … and Rand Miller is still a pussy

    Well, I can’t be expected to have a lot of endurance this early in the year … so, it’ll have to be tomorrow for the report of the SB Hill Climb and the tale of how Rand Miller is such weak sauce.

    But you can check out pictures of the hill climb here … and read up on Rand’s blog about how he can’t hold his liquor.

    – – – – –




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    2 Responses to Uphill Battles

    1. January 4, 2011 at

      Im so happy you’re back!!

    2. January 4, 2011 at

      1. I’m funnier than rand, and hernado put together. Check out my lance shit from 2009! (honestly though… rand is pretty funny for a scientist)
      2. I wouldn’t have to fact check if people updated their websites
      3. I had plenty of caveats about accuracy
      4. I wondered about Wells Fargo – the denial of any drama masks an ugly backroom saxo bank like theatre piece
      5. Laurie Furman has some proving to do… though i wish her team luck and will be watching her Cat 3’s and Bs
      6. Tibco 2 needs a better name. Sounds like a Borg name. What about Starship Tibco or something with a different, less evil star trek connotation.
      7. I’d sign my real name but I can’t see what difference it would make – its not like you know who i am either way.
      8. I still have not heard on any Yahoo people and i actually sent them an email, i don’t think thats a good thing.

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